Sal's Blog of Nothing

Yesterday morning while on the treadmill at LA Fitness, I saw a news report where a teenaged girl named Neda was shot and killed at a rally regarding this whole Iran Presidential controversy. See the video at the bottom (it’s kinda graphic). My first thought was that we should go over there and tear that country to pieces.

After a few minutes of feeling pissed off, I started putting a few things together in my head – and my feelings changed. I started thinking that this was a great plan to get the American public ON the Iran War bandwagon. What a great, great idea.

First of all, it’s not the “monster” media we’re getting this feeling from. (And by the way, the media is really falling apart lately – they know we think they’re bullshit and they’re all pointing their fingers at one another lately – have you noticed?) It’s actual citizens in Iran publishing videos and links on YouTube and Twitter. So it’s innocent. Right? There’s no motive involved here. It’s “the people” showing us this stuff. Right?

Wrong. I believe this is all a well laid-out plan.. The leadership in our country who’s pushing for a war with Iran knew this rigged election would bring us to where we are today – demonstrations on the streets of Iran with citizens being killed by those in power. AND – they knew that YouTube and Twitter would be used to bring this information to us in a far more trustworthy manner than the typical biased media outlets.

After seeing teenaged girls like Neda killed – and however many other videos there are of citizens being killed in the streets – how likely is it that the American public is going to make a big stink about us going in there are taking the reigns in Iran? A LOT less likely…

Well, I just saw 191 on the scale this morning.. It’s very nice to walk behind women and children and not have them looking over their shoulder, watching my every move. It’s also nice to be out of size 44 pants and into 34’s… My goal is 30 but I’ll be satisfied with 32… It’s probably safe for me to start buying clothes about now – I only have 11 more pounds to lose..

In regards to weighing food – I know it works – but that didn’t work for me. I basically ate until I was satisfied (and sometimes even more) but I ate the right foods. I found things I really enjoyed eating. Mostly Caesar Salads with Grilled Chicken and Ranch Dressing – and NOT light dressing either.. Full fat.. I just got the dressing on the side and “dipped” instead of putting it on the salad. I was introduced to Sushi and Sashimi by Kona Grille (heh – see www.salcollaziano.com) – and THAT was a lifesaver. Sushi and Sashimi are a WHOLE LOT healthier than Cheeseburgers and Hot Dogs – and that helped big time. So finding foods I liked and NOT worrying about eating like a bird worked for me.

Heck, you can eat just about all the lettuce and grilled chicken you want without having to worry. Same goes for Salmon and other types of fish – whether it be in sushi/sashimi form or cooked. Oh yeah, I’d have a lot of lettuce and fish meals as well…

Every so often I’d have snacks like potato chips or Sun Chips. Just ONE serving per day, though. Another thing I’d eat EVERY day was Non-Fat Greek Yogurt. It’s so thick and creamy you wouldn’t believe it. The name is Chobani. I’d also eat one of those new high fiber chewy granola bars – and sometimes I’d throw some peanut butter on top…

When I went out to eat, I’d have a little bread.. And my salads normally had croutons – and I’d have a few.. So I didn’t do “no carb” or anything like that. I had plenty of natural sugar (from the fruit in the yogurts), some bread and rice with my sushi. In any event, I DID do a LOT of exercise.. 20 minutes of cardio EVERY morning before I ate.. I’ve boosted that up to 30 minutes now since I’m looking to lose that “last few pounds” which is very difficult. I’d also weight train on Monday, Tuesday and Friday – and on days that I didn’t weight train, I’d “often” (not always) go to the gym a second time and do another 30-40 minutes of cardio.

I’m PRETTY sure the hard part is over now.. I mean, I do have some more weight to lose – but I’m happy where I am. Once I reach my goal, I’ll relax a little bit – but still watch the scale closely. When I find myself gaining a few pounds, I’ll turn it up again – watch my diet and hit the gym twice a day – and be back on my way to where I’m comfortable. So I WILL splurge a bit – probably on weekends at least a day or so – and see how that goes. I’m VERY comfortable being VERY active so I don’t mind doing this for the rest of my life. I’ve actually learned to REALLY enjoy being out and about like I am…

I’m at the gym day in and day out – often twice a day – and I see so many people making the same mistake: paying a personal trainer. Now I’m not saying there’s no logical scenario where a personal trainer makes sense – just more often than not it’s only a temporary fix – for a fee.

I see women doing all these odd ball exercises that they’ll never do again once they reach their goal. Basically things that are awkward and difficult to do. The problem with this is that unless you commit to doing these types of exercises for the rest of your life, you’re going to gain all the weight back once you stop.

The solution is not to pay somebody who’s going to charge you money to lose weight, than charge you again after you’ve gained it all back – again and again and again. But to find exercises that you can do consistently and comfortably for the rest of your life.

I love weight lifting – so I’ll have no trouble staying comitted to doing it for as long as my body allows me to. I’ve been lifting for 22 years (I only got serious this past October). The cardio training (the area most personal trainers appear best at) was my problem. However, I’ve found the treadmill easy enough to do on a daily basis (often twice a day).

So when I eventually reach my goal, maintaining will be easy since I’m not going to give up the routine that brought me success. Whereas everyone doing these obviously unusually uncomfortable, awkward exercises will celebrate when they can finally stop and leave that misery in the past. Big mistake.

Now some of you ladies may love the personal trainers. They ALWAYS give you that “touchy, feely” attention that your husband stopped giving you a long time ago. If you’re at least half way decent, they’ll take every opportunity to grab you and/or “assist” you in your efforts – innocently, of course (insert halo here).

If they DON’T touch you, than they’re either gay or you have a lot of work to do. And you can take that to the bank, ma’am.

When I hit the bathroom in a public place, there’s nothing I hate more than walking in and seeing a limited amount of urinals forcing me into the position of peeing right next to another man.

I always end up finding a stall and locking myself in there to do my fuckin’ business. It’s not that I’m socially inadequate or worried that somebody is going to laugh at my tiny pecker. I’m just uncomfortable being three inches away from another man with his penis hanging out.

When is it ever socially acceptible for two men to be standing side by side in a public place with their penises out? Is it too damn much trouble to ask for a little separation and/or a divider of some sort with these urinals? Apparently, it is – because all too many of men’s restrooms are laid out in such a way.

Am I the only one uninterested in crossing streams or having a urine “sword fight” in the bathroom?

So I went to see Drag Me To Hell last night with my wife and mother in law. It was a pretty cool movie – not the greatest – but the story was cool and the acting was good enough to keep me interested for an hour and a half – or however long the movie was. There were a couple of parts that were silly and a few that were surely meant to be funny (let’s hope). But all in all, it was a decent movie.

Unfortunately, the immature assholes in the theater were relentless in their efforts to prove that they were too tough to be scared by a movie. This same nonsense happened with the re-release of The Exorcist in 2000. I only lasted about 5 minutes before all the laughter in the audience really ruined the experience.

Of COURSE it’s not going to be scary anymore. The movie was made in 1973. Even Psycho isn’t scary anymore. The original Friday the 13th, Halloween and Nightmare on Elm Street movies aren’t scary either.  I can admit that old flicks like Frankenstein actually ARE more funny than scary. But CAN’T you just enjoy the flick for what it is?

No. YOU have to prove to everyone around you that you’re so tough, you LAUGH at scary movies. Wow! Boy, would I hate to meet up with YOU in a dark alley! Holy crap! You’re a SUPER intimidating asshole! Is that the incentive? Do you impress your friends with your massive helping of courage? Or does your ditzy girlfriend give you a better blow job at the end of the night because now it’s extremely obvious that you fear nothing? You big, fearless bear, you…