This week on Fox News there was a report about two high school girls in Texas starting a club on campus called Redefining Beautiful. They say they want to be liked for who they are, not what they look like. So, the girls pledge to attend class every Tuesday without makeup. Read more
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Tags: beautiful, campus, fox, girls, high school, news, pretty, redefining, texas | Posted under General, Newsflash | 
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
Have you seen our new commercial?! Wow! Our magnets make people strong and healthy! Just watch how we take one person after another and push and pull them until they lose their balance. And THEN, after we put our special super dooper magnet on them, they keep their balance much better! It has NOTHING to do with the fact that the first time we move them, they’re not sure what to expect and have trouble holding themselves up – but for the second push or shove, their mind/body knows exactly how to counter the action and remain balanced.
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
Take one… Action!
Does your neck look like a wrinkled, sagging mess of loose flesh?! Yeah?! Well have WE got news for YOU!
Now with our special cream and neck flesh exerciser, you – YES you – can have the tight, sexy neck of a nineteen year old prostitute. You, YES you – can look like a teenager just like in the old days. Haven’t you seen our commercials? Did you notice the drastic before and after differences? First, you’ll see our old bag looking saggy and wrinkly – and THEN! Ta da! You have the new, tight, sexy old lady with a huge, neck flesh pulling smile, looking practically straight up into the air to pull all that SHIT tight! Congratulations! Oh, did we just tell you the secret to our system? Cut… Take two….
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
Don’t you just hate it when you hire a guy from that other guy’s “list” and he bangs your daughter, molests your cat and watches porn pay-per-view all day long instead of working? Well that won’t happen at Sally’s List! Because at Sally’s List, you’ll only find angels from Heaven! Heaven, I tell you! I mean, WE tell you! Because we’re a huge organization with hundreds of thousands of employees. No, we’re not just some twenty-one year old girl living in her parent’s basement! We’re big. And we’re safe! And we’re angels – from Heaven! Remember?
MoreTags: angie's list, angieslist, craig's list, craigslist | Posted under General | No Comments
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
A long time ago I used to ask myself the question, “Has the world gone mad?”. These days I don’t have to ask.
The new Gap logo – which isn’t the new Gap logo anymore because everyone went crazy – created such a public outcry that Gap decided to stay with their old logo instead. There were headlines like, “New Gap logo met with outrage, general indignation”, “Gap Rebrands Itself Into Oblivion” and “New Gap Logo is a Box of Fail”. I saw people commenting on blogs stating they’d never buy Gap merchandise again.
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
What the hell is wrong with people in Florida. I can’t wait to get the F! out of here and back to a place with intelligent life. They can’t even make entrances for parking lots without F’ing it up. There’s a busy street with a new entrance for a shopping center that I visit frequently. The lip into the parking lot is an inch and a half to two inches high – and it’s not a gradual rise. It’s straight up to nearly two inches right from the start. So as you enter, you pretty-much ram into it like a little curb and slam over.
MoreTags: florida, intelligence | Posted under General | 1 Comment
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
Now that I have a few minutes to spare, I’d like to figure out what’s going on with mothers today. I was just in Orlando doing “the parks” and I saw a fairly good share of pre-teen girls bare asses. Ya know daisy dukes? When I was in my 20s in the 90s, teenaged girls wore them like it was mandatory. More often than not, you could see the bottom of a girl’s ass when she wore them. I didn’t have a problem with that.
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
While on the elliptical machine this morning, I observed the same old thing – overweight women on the treadmills reading, talking on the phone and as usual, not sweating. Is it really rocket science that if you want to lose weight, you need to work at it? It’s not easy. If it were easy, everybody would be in great shape. What’s the deal? Are these women afraid to sweat?
MoreTags: apoptosis, car, cell, cells, death, elliptical, exercise, feminine, hair, machine, men, overweight, paint, pubic, sweat, tint, tints, treadmill, wax, windows, women | Posted under Featured, General | No Comments
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
Oh! My God! It’s so horrible! Someone in the Miss America (or whatever) pageant posed nude for a picture! Gosh! Now what are we going to do?! Ya know what?! Who the F! cares?! What is it that makes it so bad to be photographed naked? If you are, than you can forget about being in a beauty pageant. Imagine how “horrified” everyone would be if an important female politician was “outed” for having a naked photo floating around the internet somewhere.
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
WTF is with so many young guys in Manhattan with big, scruffy Osama Bin Laden beards? Is this the new thing? Everybody has to have a F’in big hairy beard with shit growing in it? Go ahead, check it out. Next time you go to Times Square you’ll see a bunch of dainty, skinny guys skipping around on their tippy toes with their arms down to their sides and hands sticking out palms facing up prancing around like fools. Maybe they’re all paying homage to Bin Laden or something. I don’t know.. Do you know?
MoreTags: beards, bin, laden, manhattan, new york city, osama | Posted under General | No Comments
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:20
The food in Manhattan is penis. Nothing special at all. I expected better. I’m sure there’s a few great restaurants around – but I didn’t have time to try everywhere. I was downtown, midtown and uptown. The pizza here is much worse than my favorite spots in South Florida. They skim the top with the thinnest bit of cheese without having to call it something else. I had a cheese calzone in Little Italy that didn’t have any flavor at all – almost no ricotta cheese – along with the most watery sauce I’ve ever had (very little flavor as you could imagine). I had a bacon, egg and cheese bagel at a diner – again, no better than food I get in South Florida – and the bagel itself was a hard disaster. I probably should have stuck with the guys selling food in carts on the streets.
MoreTags: bagels, central park, china town, chinese food, food, italian food, little italy, manhattan, new york city, restaurants, the big apple, times square | Posted under General | No Comments
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:21
…it’s just a plain old slash… Why is it that everyone calls this symbol: / …a backslash? Since when is it a “back” slash? I really don’t know why, but ever since the internet came along, people started having trouble with slashes. It’s all the URL’s fault. www.cadillacforums.com/forums/
Oh, my God! Double you double you double you dot cadillac forums dot com back slash forums backslash. Yack! Haven’t you been writing out the date with “slashes” since like the first grade? My birthday is 09/13/71 (everybody remember me, my birthday is coming up). That’s nine slash thirteen slash seventy-one. Not nine backslash thirteen backslash seventy-one.
MoreTags: backslash, slash | Posted under General | No Comments
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:22
I had this weird and crazy vision that reminded me of Idiocracy (the movie). Picture this.. In 2024, kids will have trading cards by Fleer, Topps and Upper Deck – only they won’t be baseball and/or football players – they’ll be politicians – complete with a nice picture in the front and full political statistics (votes, vetoes, etcetera). Every day in the newspaper – in the politics section – there will be a scoreboard with stats. Democrats will get traded for Republicans.. Republicans will get traded for Independents. Independents will get traded to one of the Tea Parties and so on…
MoreTags: beer, free agent, playing cards, politicians, politics, stadium, trades | Posted under General | No Comments
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:22
Kerry. Terry. Kim. Courtney. (Yes, F’ing Courtney!) – WTF is going on here? I don’t see women named Vinny.. Okay, Toni – but it’s spelled differently – and it’s not half as bad as a masculine man with a hairy chest named Courtney! What’s next? Suzy? Sarah? Amanda?
So what is the deal? I KNOW that some of you reading this can’t WAIT to have a boy and name him Jessica… So, please – tell me what’s going on here and why you’re naming your boys with a girl’s name.
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:22
What is it with little girls and baby dolls? Seriously. I’m asking… Why is it that a young girl would want a baby – and so much so as to actually GET a fake one? Is it possible that this has a huge influence on whether or not a woman has a child one day?
The reason I bring any of this up is because I see a lot of women out there with children who either don’t really want them – or just damn well should not HAVE any. But of course, just about every woman has been accustomed to having a baby since – well – practically since she was a baby. So it would feel so “wrong” to NOT have a baby. Right?
MoreTags: babies, baby, doll, girl, procreate, religion, young | Posted under Featured, General | No Comments
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 27 April 2011 03:22